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How to deal with a non-cooperating parent

עודכן: 23 בדצמ׳ 2021


Danny Sasson, coach and mediator


The existence of the divorce agreement, which specifies in each and every section everything related to the children's affairs, does not prevent the phenomenon of the parent not cooperating: the one who does not make time to spend with the children, who is late on a regular basis or goes abroad without prior notice. These facets become routine and cause tension in the entire family.


The most difficult aspect of the non-cooperating parent is everything that has to do with the inner world of the child himself. In the child's eyes, there are activities that are important to them which they wish their parents to be a part of- school trips, parent-teacher meetings, an end-of-year show and more.


When there is a parent who regularly does not take part in these activities, it raises the feeling of abandonment and neglect of the child's needs. A parent who promises to take the child out, to the movies, to the zoo, to play… starts all well and good. They promise it will happen next week, tomorrow, in two weeks (sometimes in the expectation that the child will forget). The child is waiting and expecting. In practice, the promise does not really come true.

Before you give up and apply for relief from legal entities (Family Court, OTLP, etc.), I suggest taking a breather and looking for creative solutions to make the co-parenting work. After all, the non-cooperating parent does love his child and does not consciously mean to harm him.


Discover Compassion

Remember that you chose to start a family with the "non-cooperating" parent, and there were parts of them that you loved, which led you to choose them (even if it was a long time ago ...). Try to get "in his shoes" and look for ways to raise parental awareness in him.


Contact for Support

Do not hesitate to seek professional help, turn to family members and friends of yourself, but also of the other parent, with whom you have good communication and have a good impact on the other parent, who can bridge the gap between you and bring him or her face to face with the reality regarding his or her children.


Find communication channels

Try to create more ways to communicate with the non-cooperating parent, in a non-defiant way that will incite him and motivate him to act with compassion. This will take a lot of flexibility and determination but will be worth it.

Remember that trust and belief remind us that every parent really wants the best for their child.




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Danny Sasson, coach and mediator

https://sarabzion.wixsite.com/dennysason : Website

dennysason@walla.co.il: Mail

Phone: 0544604970


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